WINE INSTEAD OF EXERCISE? OH YOU WISH!!

Trouncing The Latest Tabloid Fairy Tale

I am going to seriously enjoy popping this particular balloon.

Ooh yeah, I’m in Meanie Mode.

You’ve probably seen the article somewhere on Facebook – it’s being bandied around by wine lovers like a vengeful light sabre in a gleeful Star Wars nerd orgy.

The article is called “A Glass Of Red Wine Is The Equivalent To An Hour At The Gym, Says New Study” and it’s featured on that paragon of science and precision called “My Daily”, as authored by Daisy May Sitch.

To add insult to injury, the blurb under the headline reads “New research reveals skipping the gym in favour of the pub is ok”.

Oh, my dear Daisy May.

You go pop the wine dear.

I am going to roll up my sleeves and pop open a can of WhoopAss instead!

PANDERING TO OUR INSTANT GRATIFICATION FANTASIES

Honestly, when I first saw this I thought it was a joke.

Obvious enough for anyone to see through it.

No one could get hoodwinked by a preposterous title like that.

No one!

Then the questions started.

A LOT of questions.

So many, in fact, that I started getting worried.

People were actually taking this seriously.

I even got complaints about how I never even brought the subject up.

All this nasty training when one could sit back, put their feet up, and imbibe contentedly on some chilled Pinot Noir instead.

How mean could I get?

Right – what the squat are you talking about?

Do you seriously, in even your wildest dreams, think drinking wine could substitute an hour’s hard work at the gym?

I know a LOT of wine drinkers – never seen them flash their abs at me.

Or their nicely rounded, rock-hard butts, and well toned legs.

Have you?

It’s time to take this “article” apart and flush it down the toilet.

Let’s do this!

LIES, DAMN LIES…AND LOTS OF VINO

So, the original study in question was published on The Journal of Physiology in May 2012 (yes, that’s 3 years ago, not exactly fresh research).

The article written about it took the study and dressed it up in frilly knickers and suspender stockings to cater for the kind of sensationalistic journalism people love.

The author takes a lot of liberty with the presented research – so much, in fact, that it all goes completely overboard and sinks like stone before so much as a few breaststrokes.

Here is a the list of things that don’t add up.

OF MICE AND MEN…AND RATS AND WINE

First off – the study was done on RATS. I know some humans who fit that description perfectly, but I promise you, these were real rats. I have seen so many studies in the last 20 years done on rats that offer absolutely nothing to humans, that as soon as I see that, it sets my teeth on edge.

Rats are NOT humans. Their physiology and biochemistry is NOT the same as ours.

What works on rats will NOT necessarily work on humans.

OK so I am thinking “Damn, how did they go about giving these rodents wine to drink?”

Seriously, the injustice of it all – rats lounging around some lab taking contended sips of a fine Cabernet Sauvignon!

Well, it turns out, rats weren’t given wine.

They were a diet supplemented with resveratrol – that’s the apparently magical stuff inside red wine that is supposed to be good for you.

That, dear reader, is NOT the same thing.

The actual aim of the study was to see if resveratrol could augment the performance of running as an exercise option (the rats were made to run on a treadmill for 60 mins of daily progressive running for 12 weeks).

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TIME OUT FACTOID

The actual text in the study says the rats were made to run on “a calibrated motor driven rodent treadmill equipped with electrical stimulation for aversive foot shock”.

Apart from the mind-boggling fact that there are actually treadmills for rodents, I have to point out that these critters were running for an hour a day, 5 days a week.

On an increasing incline.

For 12 weeks!

That’s more training than some folks do in a year!

It’s also good to know that the rats that didn’t co-operate were persuaded to acquiesce with an offer they couldn’t refuse…in other words, a “combination of electrical stimulation and air puff was used to encourage rodents to run”.

Damn I wish I could do that to some people.

END OF TIME OUT FACTOID

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The study concluded that the rats receiving resveratrol did show performance gains over the control group.

However, in contrast to what the article states, nowhere in the study does it say that the aim was to see if supplementing with resveratrol could substitute exercise.

In fact, it does not, at any point, conclude that resveratrol could substitute exercise – only that it provided some enhancement to running.

So, even if resveratrol supplementation in HUMANS were viable, you need to be running like a thief from the cops in the first place, for it to have any effect.

Ouch!

That’s gotta hurt the exercise bashers a little bit.

Let’s hurt them a bit more…

OK, let’s see how much resveratrol these rats were actually taking.

LET’S DO THE MATH

Whip out that trusty old abacus, boys!!

The study says the rats were given 4g resveratrol per kg diet.

This works out to 146mg resveratrol per kg bodyweight per day.

So, a person weighing a conservative 70kg would need 10,220mg per day to have the same dose as the rats.

Seeing that we are talking about wine (and not supplements), how many glasses would we need to get that amount of resveratrol in the tank?

Now, according to Dr. Xi Zhao-Wilson, PhD (and no, that’s not the ball Tom Hanks had in Cast Away – I checked), a fluid ounce of red wine (that’s about 30mls to you metric stinkers) contains about 90 micrograms of resveratrol. That’s 0.09mg.

A glass of wine is approximately 5 and 1/3 ounces (158mls, if the metric princesses are still about).

That means one glass contains 0.48mg of resveratrol.

So, in order to get the 10,220mg I need per day, I would need to drink…21,000 glasses of wine – a day.

Eh???

Are we drinking the vino…or swimming in it?

No way even the most avid (aka: well-sloshed) wine drinker can drink anywhere near that much – that’s including in their most frenzied, wine-filled fantasies.

And, if we take into account Dr. Zhao-Wilson’s (not the ball) note that research has shown that you can get a beneficial effect by using a 10-fold lower dose, that’s still 2,100 freakin’ glasses of wine a day.

Yeah, right!

You’d be pickled like a Russian cabbage in record time if you even attempted to get anywhere near close to that.

I’m almost feeling sorry for the wine-touting, fluffy-slippered, coach potatoes right now.

Almost – but not quite.

So guys – let’s all take a moment to gaze at the fragments of your dreams.

Ahhhh…..

Done?

I still got some more…

HERE IS A PENULTIMATE SPANKING FOR YOU

You know, kinda like the cherry on the squished cake.

There was a study published on the Applied Physiology, Nutrition, and Metabolism Journal on July 2014 that was done on resveratrol supplementation in HUMANS (not rats).

This study was done using 150mg of resveratrol per day (which is a lot less than the dosage used with the rats, but still clocks in at about 312 glasses of wine a day).

The exercise form was High Intensity Interval training (which is a far more effective mode of exercise than running is).

Even at this highly reduced intake, the study found that in humans, even this low dose actually DECREASED the effectiveness of the exercise as compared to the control group.

I quote Dr. Brendan J. Gurd, one of the scientists in this study and a professor in the School of Kinesiology and Health Studies, who says “The easiest way to experience the benefits of physical activity is to be physically active. The efficacy of RSV at improving metabolic and cardiovascular functions is not as profound as was once thought.”

Facepalm!

ONE FOR THE ROAD?

Hell yeah!

A study reported online in Cell Metabolism, carried out using 75mg daily resveratrol supplementation in healthy, post-menopausal women, showed no beneficial effects.

If those old lasses had decided to drink it, that’s 156 glasses of wine a day (again, good luck with that) for no other result than to die of alcohol intoxication.

Here is another quote from one of the scientists involved:

“Resveratrol supplements have become popular because studies in cell systems and rodents show that resveratrol can improve metabolic function and prevent or reverse certain health problems like diabetes, heart disease and even cancer,” says senior investigator Samuel Klein, MD, director of Washington University’s Center for Human Nutrition. “But our data demonstrate that resveratrol supplementation does not have metabolic benefits in relatively healthy, middle-aged women.”