KILLING THE MYTHS

Why We Need Less Lies In The Fitness World

“You know, I heard that the truth actually is…”

Anyone here remember that amazing little 1987 song by Fleetwood Mac called “Little Lies”?

One of the lines from it that seems to stick to everyone’s head is the haunting chorus of “tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies”.

We live in a world of preconceived notions and limitless misconceptions.

In just about everything.

You see, an inordinate amount of people have a very learned opinion about things they know less than nothing about.

That’s why you get all these pocket professors telling you the best way to do YOUR shit.

Because THEY know all about the best way to deal with your shit

Problem is, they seem to have absolutely no clue about what to do about theirs.

Can anyone spell – hypocritical?

I am sure you know you are surrounded by these people

You can probably point out quite a few right off the bat too.

Because, as Stephen King once said in ‘The Drawing of the Three’. “Money talks and bullshit walks”.

And there is definitely no shortage of that particular bovine commodity in this world.

So there is no reason to be surprised when we find out that this overabundance of “common sense” will spill over into the fitness world as well.

Those who like me have been in this game at a serious level for some time, will be very familiar with a lot of the legends that surround our little slice of the planet.

It is of course, patently impossible to debunk all fitness myths in one article (perhaps not even in one book, unless I write one like ‘The Lord of the Rings’).

So, I will attempt to hit some of the really common ones (read “the crap I keep hearing over and over that aggravates the screws out of my mind”) right here.

Let’s start.

ALL GYMS ARE THE SAME, SO THE CHEAPEST CHOICE IS THE BEST

One of my uncles is fond of saying “the only things that goes ‘cheep cheep’ is the bird in the tree”.

And if you are anywhere over 12 years old and you are still thinking that saving money by getting the cheapest possible option is a viable solution, then you need some serious medical attention.

And urgently too.

Because every time you pay peanuts, you get monkeys.

Every time.

You can’t possibly be out of your teens and NOT have figured that one out yet.

Going for the cheapest option is an exercise in disaster.

Because there is always a reason why you get a cheap and there is always a reason why you get expensive.

Would you expect a 5 star hotel to cost the same as a three star one?

Not at all.

And, by the same token, you would expect the level of service you will get and the experience you will enjoy at a 5 star hotel to be a reflection of the extra price.

In a similar vein, would you pay the same price for a family GP or for a highly specialized surgeon?

No contest, right?

Gyms are the same.

If someone professes to be the cheapest around, it will serve in your best interest to take a second look.

There are several factors to be taken into consideration.

It is not only about equipment.

It is also about knowledge and experience and professionalism.

It is about attention to detail, of keeping up to date with the latest science.

It is about sheer delight in helping people be the best they can be. It’s not a job. It’s a PASSION.

It is also about being a great fit at the gym you eventually decide to train at.

It can be the best gym in the world and it won’t be do you any good if you don’t fit into the way things are there.

However, the overwhelming odds are that the people who choose the cheapest gym will either be cheapos themselves, or will just not last any longer than a few weeks.

If you are serious about changing your life, make a good choice.

Not a cheap one.

I’M A FEMALE, SO I SHOULD NEVER LIFT WEIGHTS

Enough of this goddamn lie already!!

We have been through this several times.

This is one of those myths that just won’t die!

I can’t believe how many otherwise intelligent, well educated people believe this steaming pile of bat guano.

It’s like once you mention fitness and training, you have entered this land of dark, deep magic and the laws of science and rational thought do not apply anymore.

So we get a lot of voodoo.

Honestly ladies, GET REAL!!!

The primary indicator of longevity in a woman is MUSCLE MASS.

Spell it.

Muscle Mass, my dear sexy mama!!!

That means that if you want to live a long and healthy life, EVERYTHING you do should be geared towards getting you more muscle.

So forget your long ass walks in your tight ass yoga pants.

Walking is not working for you.

Forget your aerobic humba jumba lessons. Hopping about doesn’t build you muscle.

And PLEASE, dump your hippety skippety pink weights workouts too. Pink weights come with a printed warning “pretend workout attached”.

If you want to be Wonder Woman, hit the real weights!

HARD!!

And HEAVY!!

No other way.

Or you can just keep doing your same old shit, following the same old rules and looking just the way you always did.

Up to you.

I HAVE BEEN TRAINING FOR 4 WEEKS AND I STILL DON’T LOOK LIKE MILA KUNIS

I have seen a lot of people quit their new fitness phase after a few weeks because they aren’t getting the results they think they should be getting.

A lot of them focus on the scale and a lot constantly compare themselves with someone who should have nothing to do with their intended goal.

That’s of course, a great way to dejection, which will inevitably lead to failure.

But then again, misconceptions are a bitch.

First of all, a lot of the first improvements during a new training program, are not immediately visible.

Better blood circulation. Improved posture. Reduced cholesterol. Better stamina. More stable blood sugar.

Nope, you can’t see those. So they must be worthless, right?

The visible gains take much longer to happen of course.

Inches do not drop off as if by magic. You have to bust your ass for that one.

Speaking of asses, they don’t get those magic curves fast either.

You are going to have to squat the hell out of your quivery glutes to get it sport that desired Formula 1 track curvy look.

The scale doesn’t tell you a lot either. Despite women’s obsession with them.

In fact, the scale comes out very rarely with my own clients.

I prefer using our own workout stats as a benchmark.

Makes every session an exciting challenge when you have to beat the previous one.

Focus on what works, not on what you THINK should work.

I CAN EAT PIZZA AND CHOCS BECAUSE I CAN BURN THAT OFF DURING MY WORKOUT

This one is the kind of statement that makes me want to slam my head against the nearest wall.

The hell kind of bullshit is that?

If you had just purchased a brand new car, would you scratch off part of the paint, simply because the car was so shiny?

I mean there is plenty shiny paint man, why not scratch off some?

Would you spend hours cooking a great dish, but douse it with salt when it was done?

Niether of those two makes sense right?

Well, neither does this way of thinking.

Workouts are not there to burn off damages done by your piss-poor sense of self discipline.

In fact, workouts without a great diet will simply not work. Or barely at all.

So STOP finding excuses to screw up. Stop giving yourself a leeway you don’t deserve.

And stop finding an excuse to derail your progress in the short term and destroy your goals in the long run.

That said, DO plan in treats and little rewards for yourself. I don’t care how self disciplined and iron willed you are, you will never manage to eat clean and be on track 100% of the time.

You need a little reward every now and again. Just make sure you EARN it though.

Use it to mark the little milestones that punctuate your journey to greatness.